The (somewhat) Subtle Art of Creating Boundaries
Learning to create boundaries is so rewarding! Think of all that you will gain! Time for self care, time to get to know yourself better, the chance to be fully authentic.
I know that it’s easy to believe that doing something for someone and “being there” for them all the time is a good way to show love. But when you are exhausted from doing that all the time, you are unable to show up as your best self. So, create boundaries, take time to refresh, practice saying no, and never forget that YOU are just as important as anyone else in your life.
Affirmation: “I can firmly but politely decline others when they make a request I cannot honor.”
Saying "no" to someone is probably the most difficult aspect of setting boundaries so I've included a few of the way's I've learned to say "no" and create boundaries.
When someone asks something of you, you can:
Pause & sit with it.
If someone makes a request and you're no sure in that moment, tell them you need some time to think about it. Then take that time and explore how you feel. This is crucial to your self-care. If the thought of it makes you unhappy and/or overwhelms you, give yourself permission to say "no".
Say "not right now."
You want to give people the best version of yourself so if you're at full capacity, just tell them "not right now".
Everyone appreciates honesty and being unapologetically authentic is always respected. So be straightforward. I think you'll find that most people don't want to overstretch you, they just trust you! So trust that they will be understanding of you setting this new boundary and saying "no".
For a few more idea's on how to say "no", get my ebook: "17 ways to say no without saying no".